TAZ Graduation Liveblog: Episodes 26-30 Reactions In-Depth

Episode 26: Little Gray Cells
Episode 27: Long Way Down
Episode 28: Business Partners
Episode 29: Princi-pal
Episode 30: Take Your Firbolg to Work Day

---

Episode 26: Little Gray Cells

i still wasnt prepared for garyvoice god i forgot how irritating it was
had to do deep breathing exercises because i forgot how mad the ending of the last episode made me
THEY LITERALLY. GOT. TRANSPORTED.
you teleported fitzroy away. he could do nothing about it!! you fucking kidnapped him, and now youre punishing them for it!
i have to calm down. i am 39 seconds into the current episode.
people have already mentioned this but its insane to me that he mashed a real life persons name together for fitzroys love interest and didnt even pronounce it right. why are you saying ra iners like rainier is she a college student in a wheelchair or the largest mountain in washington state?
he didnt even bring up the lich bone army in the recap. wasnt that important? wasnt that like the driving plot point of last episode?
not that this thing even has a plot but ygwim
theres a dozen hellhounds tearing towards ten unconscious students, and theyre without their Firbolg friend.

12 hellhounds tore towards 10 unconscious students, how long would it take to lose 90% of your podcasts viewer retention?
really funny that theyre keeping the exact same calming peaceful stardew valley knockoff-esque intro music right after the description of what could be an extremely gruesome and traumatizing scene
im just joking gray could put the students in saw traps and vart still wouldnt be able to describe it effectively enough to command any serious sort of tension
why is vart measuring the distance in yards not feet all the characters move using foot measurements
to be fair it doesnt matter anyway since he just teleports the players wherever he wants them to be they could only have 10 feet of movement and still be able to cross a football field in like 0.5 seconds
because god fucking forbid the disabled characters disability was actually disabling in any way.
like i know that not every disabled person thinks the same way about everything but all the ones ive known would want their full experience described not this tiny sliver written by someone who clearly thinks disabled people would be so much cooler if they didnt have to deal with annoying things like pain or chronic fatigue or stairs or anything that actually made it difficult to exist in the world.
its like when theres a character with an eyepatch or a prosthetic limb and the person writing them has clearly never thought about what living with something like that would be like and just thought wow that metal arm looks so cool i will give that to my character. im sure this has no downsides or anything else i need to portray in any sort of nuanced way. as we all know having a mobility aid or prosthetic is basically the exact same thing as being fully abled
i know i said i wouldnt get mad this early and after taking a full minute to slowly breathe in and out im not going to but you already established that the farspeech notebook is in rainiers possession not anyone elses who you are not with at the moment.
IS GRIFFIN STUPID!
vart just said there were 30 seconds before the hellhounds reached the students, so the party had one round to prepare. it doesnt matter that none of that makes any sense it doesnt matter that a round of combat only takes 6 seconds. i breathe in and slowly out and as i do inner serenity washes over me. it is the feeling of letting go. i have attained zen mastery.
okay counter: 622 not in the transcript but its right in the middle of clint rolling a perception check
the best character description of all time god its like im there
now i know i said i wouldnt get mad and that i was in fact doing everything in my power to stay calm and avoid getting mad but you already fucking established that the farspeech notebook is in rainiers possession not anyone elses who you are not with at the moment.
IS GRIFFIN STUPID?!
vart thought griffin was aiming the massive damaging wall of water towards the students in the tree instead of the enemies in the opposite direction
ac id splash doesnt affect terrain why are you making it affect terrain to funnel the hellhounds
slight chuckle at clint targeting the most pitiful looking one on purpose
(incoherent screaming) HE CAN ALWAYS FUCKING SNEAK ATTACK WHEN HE WANTS THAT IS THE POINT OF PLAYING A GODDAMNED SWASHBUCKLER ROGUE
griffins only supposed to roll on the wild magic table after using tides of chaos or if he rolls a 1 on the d20 for wild magic but vart continues to make him roll on the table after he casts a spell
ad break
heroforge ad im killing myself
this mcelroys ad is like when i wanted to get dice from die hard dice and vart was talking about his die hard dice someone sent him in the very next episode
i could never stop using heroforge though i love making my silly guys
the it/its warforged is back
vart has become so lazy with his voices hes literally just talking slightly slower for this one
the true sight glasses are not super bad considering its a minute which is 1/60th the duration of the normal 6th level spell i feel like thats pretty balanced it is also what fitzroy asked for
god i still have 10 minutes left are they really going to go through spell descriptions for ten fucking minutes
there are only 3 minutes left i can do this surely nothing could make me horribly mad in these last 3 minutes
argo you begin to sweat and you feel your skin crawl below you can now see a portal torn in the air it is incredibly large
the demon prince while his plan to punish the party for doing nothing is ostensively going to shit
19 perception to see that argo is looking at the demon prince fitzroy can literally just use his eyes for that what did griffin even need to roll perception for to move his head enough to see this
why doesnt the good perception check carry over so griffin doesnt have to roll another one immediately
the ooga booga creepy music is so loud when the characters talk it feels like theyre shouting over the dj at the worlds worst rave
griffin needs to start taking mixing lessons from sparkledog breakcore artists they have that shit on lock
and now argo has to make wisdom saving throws if he wants to play his own fucking character
a while ago i read a comment theorizing that the reason so many of varts plotlines involve drugging mind control or mindwipes were not just because hes a terrible dm but because its a secret fetish someone should look into that get some of our top jerkers on this
normally people are allowed to autofail spells if they want to but i guess clint has to roll regardless
nat 20 perception check and theres still barely any narration to describe what fitzroy sees
the music is back but its kind of nice not hearing everything theyre saying again
travis wont even let him roll damage for the thunder wave sure who cares i guess
apparently fitzroy swearing terrified an immortal demon prince enough to run away and not keep mind controlling argo
Argo: Maybe now that I know the demon prince is there i ll have a better chance of perceiving it and maybe i wont have such shitty perception and wisdom rolls
Griffin: Thats not how it works
i keep wondering how justin will salvage this plot for the group
okay counter: 670
vart joking about having them fall to their deaths would piss me off if i cared
the final part of episode 26 ends with a reflection on the timeline and the frustration of the liveblogger

Episode 27: Long Way Down

vart is describing the events that have happened like insanely cool and interesting things and not only do we know hes lying it doesnt sound interesting in the recap
okay counter: 659
they have been dm teleported to the godscar chasm for some reason
maybe im a crazy person whos wasting a lot of time but when im running my campaign we always start where we last left off because 1 that makes sense and 2 i wont be forcing the story on my pcs if the location i want them to go is where they want to go at that moment
vart makes argo edgily kill everyone like a shadow the hedgehog roleplayer because of hell magic or something
no he doesnt because its a dream great so no consequences
to be clear i wouldnt want argo to have actually killed the other players without his input but there is enough nothing happening that it almost makes me wish it had happened
griffin just said hes going to use the nat 20 he rolled at a later date which goes against the entire concept of dnd and is also fucking stupid
however because it was in a dream and vart did not capitalize on it in any way at all i dont care and think griffin should be allowed to do this regardless
the crew explores the godscar chasm and deals with the implications of dream state vs reality
the discussion on cosmos and the sun and moon metaphors continues to unravel the lore
the party debates alliance with chaos and order and the implications of subvarting expectations
more meta commentary about the cosmology being overly complex and the lack of stakes in the plot continues to gnaw at the liveblogger

Episode 28: Business Partners

god im not looking forward to this
Order says a line that reveals intent to start talking at the group which is brutal
subvartion again as vart tries to force a narrative that the party cant break
this is so stupid this is unbelievably stupid i feel fucking insane
the tiers of government and corporate power are debated with libertarian undertones
the ad breaks continue and the humor sinks deeper into a satire of the sponsors
the party debates economic philosophy and the realities of private property vs public oversight
althea returns with a backstory about trusting government and the subsequent red tape
the narrator notes that this is not a campaign with clear stakes and the pacing is slow and repetitive
the liveblogger expresses a growing weariness with the ad-heavy segments and the overlong NPC focus
the final segments escalate tensions about the plan while the party negotiates with the demon prince and the government actors

Episode 29: Princi-pal

the last substantive edit i made on this was on dec 3rd of last year it is now february 28th 2025
youre here to read my reaction to now the second worst AP campaign vart has run to date
the episode opens with a melodramatic but poorly executed recap
there is a long discussion about windiness, pacing and the need for better engagement with the audience
the group contends with the demon prince and the plan to form an alliance to defeat greater threats
the narrator deconstructs varts cosmology as overly abstract and impractical for storytelling
Justin attempts to bring coherence to the session but the dm's cosmic metaphors derail the plot
the party debates whether to kill or spare key NPCs and the consequences of their actions
a number of ad breaks interrupt the flow and provoke further commentary about sponsorships and brand strategy
the liveblogger notes a shift toward libertarian capitalist ideas and questions the moral alignment of the heroes
the episode ends with a cliffhanger on the true motivations of the demon prince and the potential alliances with the government

Episode 30: Take Your Firbolg to Work Day

nonsensical title the crew heads to a location of work with a firbolg in the party but it does not make the title better
gary is back dont do this to me
another recap tick marks and the narrator echoes the ad breaks and sponsor references
the liveblogger calls out the political undertones and the questionable depiction of government influence in the campaign
the crew interacts with various NPCs and the firbolg uses the opportunity to confront the dm about worldbuilding inconsistencies
the tension rises as the party confronts the mortality of the NPCs and the looming threat of the demon prince
there is a long sequence of filler dialogue and the liveblogger laments the slow pacing while still tracking micro-tensions
the episode features more ad breaks and a meta discussion on sponsorships and branding around the mcelroy universe
the liveblogger accumulates a long list of counters and notes about the narrative missteps and the absence of strong stakes
the session ends with a reflective note about the ongoing decline of the brand and a comparison to other media ecosystems

Current counter notes continue as the liveblogger traces further counters and editorial thoughts about the season and the brand's trajectory.

current okay counter: 719

end of episode 30 marks a turning point in the livebloggers critique and hints at future exploration of the mcelroy brand and the TA Z universe.

ive had some ups and downs highs then lows yet the mcelroy brand seems to be on a continuous downward slope and i question the sustainability of abnimals and the shift away from professional content creation.

there was an interesting post on the subreddit about reviving the brand and the liveblogger ponders whether rebranding could salvage the essence of the original work.

at the end the voice of homestuck is invoked as a parallel to the enduring meta-narrative of long-running online media, and a closing remark ties the reflection to the broader landscape of fan-driven commentary.

end of the document -

"let me tell you about homestuck".

TAZ Graduation Liveblog: Episodes 26-30 Reactions In-Depth

---

i still wasnt prepared for garyvoice god i forgot how irritating it was

had to do deep breathing exercises because i forgot how mad the ending of the last episode made me

THEY LITERALLY. GOT. TRANSPORTED.

you teleported fitzroy away. he could do nothing about it!! you fucking kidnapped him, and now youre punishing them for it!

i have to calm down. i am 39 seconds into the current episode.

people have already mentioned this but its insane to me that he mashed a real life persons name together for fitzroys love interest and didnt even pronounce it right. why are you saying ra iners like rainier is she a college student in a wheelchair or the largest mountain in washington state?

he didnt even bring up the lich bone army in the recap. wasnt that important? wasnt that like the driving plot point of last episode?

not that this thing even has a plot but ygwim

theres a dozen hellhounds tearing towards ten unconscious students, and theyre without their Firbolg friend.

12 hellhounds tore towards 10 unconscious students, how long would it take to lose 90% of your podcasts viewer retention?

really funny that theyre keeping the exact same calming peaceful stardew valley knockoff-esque intro music right after the description of what could be an extremely gruesome and traumatizing scene

im just joking gray could put the students in saw traps and vart still wouldnt be able to describe it effectively enough to command any serious sort of tension

why is vart measuring the distance in yards not feet all the characters move using foot measurements

to be fair it doesnt matter anyway since he just teleports the players wherever he wants them to be they could only have 10 feet of movement and still be able to cross a football field in like 0.5 seconds

because god fucking forbid the disabled characters disability was actually disabling in any way.

like i know that not every disabled person thinks the same way about everything but all the ones ive known would want their full experience described not this tiny sliver written by someone who clearly thinks disabled people would be so much cooler if they didnt have to deal with annoying things like pain or chronic fatigue or stairs or anything that actually made it difficult to exist in the world.

its like when theres a character with an eyepatch or a prosthetic limb and the person writing them has clearly never thought about what living with something like that would be like and just thought wow that metal arm looks so cool i will give that to my character. im sure this has no downsides or anything else i need to portray in any sort of nuanced way. as we all know having a mobility aid or prosthetic is basically the exact same thing as being fully abled

i know i said i wouldnt get mad this early and after taking a full minute to slowly breathe in and out im not going to but you already established that the farspeech notebook is in rainiers possession not anyone elses who you are not with at the moment.

IS GRIFFIN STUPID!

vart just said there were 30 seconds before the hellhounds reached the students, so the party had one round to prepare. it doesnt matter that none of that makes any sense it doesnt matter that a round of combat only takes 6 seconds. i breathe in and slowly out and as i do inner serenity washes over me. it is the feeling of letting go. i have attained zen mastery.

okay counter: 622 not in the transcript but its right in the middle of clint rolling a perception check

the best character description of all time god its like im there

now i know i said i wouldnt get mad and that i was in fact doing everything in my power to stay calm and avoid getting mad but you already fucking established that the farspeech notebook is in rainiers possession not anyone elses who you are not with at the moment.

IS GRIFFIN STUPID?!

vart thought griffin was aiming the massive damaging wall of water towards the students in the tree instead of the enemies in the opposite direction

ac id splash doesnt affect terrain why are you making it affect terrain to funnel the hellhounds

slight chuckle at clint targeting the most pitiful looking one on purpose

(incoherent screaming) HE CAN ALWAYS FUCKING SNEAK ATTACK WHEN HE WANTS THAT IS THE POINT OF PLAYING A GODDAMNED SWASHBUCKLER ROGUE

griffins only supposed to roll on the wild magic table after using tides of chaos or if he rolls a 1 on the d20 for wild magic but vart continues to make him roll on the table after he casts a spell

ad break

heroforge ad im killing myself

this mcelroys ad is like when i wanted to get dice from die hard dice and vart was talking about his die hard dice someone sent him in the very next episode

i could never stop using heroforge though i love making my silly guys

the it/its warforged is back

vart has become so lazy with his voices hes literally just talking slightly slower for this one

the true sight glasses are not super bad considering its a minute which is 1/60th the duration of the normal 6th level spell i feel like thats pretty balanced it is also what fitzroy asked for

god i still have 10 minutes left are they really going to go through spell descriptions for ten fucking minutes

there are only 3 minutes left i can do this surely nothing could make me horribly mad in these last 3 minutes

argo you begin to sweat and you feel your skin crawl below you can now see a portal torn in the air it is incredibly large

the demon prince while his plan to punish the party for doing nothing is ostensively going to shit

19 perception to see that argo is looking at the demon prince fitzroy can literally just use his eyes for that what did griffin even need to roll perception for to move his head enough to see this

why doesnt the good perception check carry over so griffin doesnt have to roll another one immediately

the ooga booga creepy music is so loud when the characters talk it feels like theyre shouting over the dj at the worlds worst rave

griffin needs to start taking mixing lessons from sparkledog breakcore artists they have that shit on lock

and now argo has to make wisdom saving throws if he wants to play his own fucking character

a while ago i read a comment theorizing that the reason so many of varts plotlines involve drugging mind control or mindwipes were not just because hes a terrible dm but because its a secret fetish someone should look into that get some of our top jerkers on this

normally people are allowed to autofail spells if they want to but i guess clint has to roll regardless

nat 20 perception check and theres still barely any narration to describe what fitzroy sees

the music is back but its kind of nice not hearing everything theyre saying again

travis wont even let him roll damage for the thunder wave sure who cares i guess

apparently fitzroy swearing terrified an immortal demon prince enough to run away and not keep mind controlling argo

Argo: Maybe now that I know the demon prince is there i ll have a better chance of perceiving it and maybe i wont have such shitty perception and wisdom rolls

Griffin: Thats not how it works

i keep wondering how justin will salvage this plot for the group

okay counter: 670

vart joking about having them fall to their deaths would piss me off if i cared

the final part of episode 26 ends with a reflection on the timeline and the frustration of the liveblogger

vart is describing the events that have happened like insanely cool and interesting things and not only do we know hes lying it doesnt sound interesting in the recap

okay counter: 659

they have been dm teleported to the godscar chasm for some reason

maybe im a crazy person whos wasting a lot of time but when im running my campaign we always start where we last left off because 1 that makes sense and 2 i wont be forcing the story on my pcs if the location i want them to go is where they want to go at that moment

vart makes argo edgily kill everyone like a shadow the hedgehog roleplayer because of hell magic or something

no he doesnt because its a dream great so no consequences

to be clear i wouldnt want argo to have actually killed the other players without his input but there is enough nothing happening that it almost makes me wish it had happened

griffin just said hes going to use the nat 20 he rolled at a later date which goes against the entire concept of dnd and is also fucking stupid

however because it was in a dream and vart did not capitalize on it in any way at all i dont care and think griffin should be allowed to do this regardless

the crew explores the godscar chasm and deals with the implications of dream state vs reality

the discussion on cosmos and the sun and moon metaphors continues to unravel the lore

the party debates alliance with chaos and order and the implications of subvarting expectations

more meta commentary about the cosmology being overly complex and the lack of stakes in the plot continues to gnaw at the liveblogger

god im not looking forward to this

Order says a line that reveals intent to start talking at the group which is brutal

subvartion again as vart tries to force a narrative that the party cant break

this is so stupid this is unbelievably stupid i feel fucking insane

the tiers of government and corporate power are debated with libertarian undertones

the ad breaks continue and the humor sinks deeper into a satire of the sponsors

the party debates economic philosophy and the realities of private property vs public oversight

althea returns with a backstory about trusting government and the subsequent red tape

the narrator notes that this is not a campaign with clear stakes and the pacing is slow and repetitive

the liveblogger expresses a growing weariness with the ad-heavy segments and the overlong NPC focus

the final segments escalate tensions about the plan while the party negotiates with the demon prince and the government actors

the last substantive edit i made on this was on dec 3rd of last year it is now february 28th 2025

youre here to read my reaction to now the second worst AP campaign vart has run to date

the episode opens with a melodramatic but poorly executed recap

there is a long discussion about windiness, pacing and the need for better engagement with the audience

the group contends with the demon prince and the plan to form an alliance to defeat greater threats

the narrator deconstructs varts cosmology as overly abstract and impractical for storytelling

Justin attempts to bring coherence to the session but the dm's cosmic metaphors derail the plot

the party debates whether to kill or spare key NPCs and the consequences of their actions

a number of ad breaks interrupt the flow and provoke further commentary about sponsorships and brand strategy

the liveblogger notes a shift toward libertarian capitalist ideas and questions the moral alignment of the heroes

the episode ends with a cliffhanger on the true motivations of the demon prince and the potential alliances with the government

nonsensical title the crew heads to a location of work with a firbolg in the party but it does not make the title better

gary is back dont do this to me

another recap tick marks and the narrator echoes the ad breaks and sponsor references

the liveblogger calls out the political undertones and the questionable depiction of government influence in the campaign

the crew interacts with various NPCs and the firbolg uses the opportunity to confront the dm about worldbuilding inconsistencies

the tension rises as the party confronts the mortality of the NPCs and the looming threat of the demon prince

there is a long sequence of filler dialogue and the liveblogger laments the slow pacing while still tracking micro-tensions

the episode features more ad breaks and a meta discussion on sponsorships and branding around the mcelroy universe

the liveblogger accumulates a long list of counters and notes about the narrative missteps and the absence of strong stakes

the session ends with a reflective note about the ongoing decline of the brand and a comparison to other media ecosystems

Current counter notes continue as the liveblogger traces further counters and editorial thoughts about the season and the brand's trajectory.

current okay counter: 719

end of episode 30 marks a turning point in the livebloggers critique and hints at future exploration of the mcelroy brand and the TA Z universe.

there was an interesting post on the subreddit about reviving the brand and the liveblogger ponders whether rebranding could salvage the essence of the original work.

end of the document -

"let me tell you about homestuck".

TAZ Graduation Liveblog: Episodes 26-30 Reactions In-Depth

Document

Summary & Guide